I'll never be ok with being apart
by oncer4life11
Summary: A request for Emma's feelings during the events of 7x02, saying goodbye to Henry.


**So this special one-shot is a request from** _ **cpfisty**_ **. It based in 7x02 and the request is: how Emma felt when she heard that Henry was in danger, how she felt about not being able to go to him straight away, what made her decide to go, how she felt when she saw him all grown up, and finally how she felt about having to leave him.**

 **I do not own OUAT or its characters just my imagination.**

 _I'll never be ok with being apart_

The day had started like most have recently, waking up having to throw up the contents of her stomach. Yep Emma knew without a shadow of a doubt she was pregnant, sure the multiple positive at-home pregnancy tests, and the confirmation from a doctor made her sure, but consistency of the morning sickness, it just made it even more so. Once she knew she was done, she often would sit with her back against the cool tile wall of the bathroom, her mind drifting to her other child, Henry. He had been gone for 3 years, finding his own story. Emma honestly got it, she did, but… at the same time all she wanted was her son safe at home, especially now. She had known for years what a great big brother he would be, and now when it was happening he was off, gone in some other realm.

Emma often found herself at least once a day going into the kid's room, sitting at his desk, looking at the few pictures that hung above it on a cork board. She would lay on top of his bed, and breath in his scent, look at the books left on his book shelf, the sketch books left behind, she wanted to leave it all the same for him for when he got back.

Then the day continued like it had for the last 7 years now; Emma, Killian and David working at the station, keeping the town safe. What drove Emma the most crazy was both her husband and dad treating her like she was made of glass or something. It was near the end of the day when they found it, Henry had sent them and Regina a message for help. Moments after getting the message Regina puffed herself to the station, Emma seconds later has to run to the bathroom, getting sick once again.

Emma walks out the bathroom, wiping her face "So what's the plan guys?"

Killian and Regina look at each other "Love, we feel it would be best if you stayed here, me and Regina will check on the lad and help" Killian answers.

"What…?" Emma gasps "He's my son too… I NEED to go."

"Emma look at me" Regina says "What if while we are there you need to get sick, that could endanger our son possibly even more. We have no idea what kind of trouble Henry is in… I know he and Killian would be devastated if something happened to you or the baby if you go…"

Emma nods as tears started up "I just want to see him."

Killian goes up to her and wraps his arms around his wife "How about this love… give us a few hours head start, let us make sure things are safe for you two and rest love" he says placing his hand on her small, barely there bump.

Emma smiles down looking at his hand "Fine… a few hours."

Killian kisses his wife and then he and Regina went to the backyard. Emma follows and watches as the portal opens and they disappear into it.

Emma goes back inside, she goes into the living room and turns on Netflix and tries to relax and watch a show but she can't. Her eyes keep darting to a picture to the right of the TV screen. It was a picture of Emma and Henry the day he graduated High school. Their standing side by side, his arm around her waist; and she has one arm around his shoulders the other hand resting on his chest, both grinning ear to ear at the camera. She smiles longingly at the picture, as happy as she is for this, she wished she still had that time with him.

After a few minutes she gets up and tries going outside into the back yard. She picks at the dead flowers on the bush, getting rid of them so new buds can grow. She moves to the shed and smiles when she sees Henry's bike, they had gotten it for him for 3 birthdays before he left. In the far left corner stands the wooden swords her dad had given him when she and her mom where in the Enchanted forest, she thinks of the time Henry spent with his grandpa and step-dad practicing with the swords. It was hard to believe how long ago all of it was already, and it killed her that she was once again missing a part of her son's life.

Emma attempts to find ways to busy herself, but after a couple hours she couldn't anymore, she opens a portal to where her son, husband, and friend where. Emma quickly finds her son and husband talking by a fire on the cool night. She couldn't believe her eyes, he was no longer a kid or even the gangly teenager who left, no he was a man. She couldn't believe how handsome he was, he was such a combination of his father and hers, and somehow there seemed to be a bit of Killian in there too. She approaches them and her son wastes no time giving her a hug. God did she miss that, hugging her son, being in his arms. She missed having him in her arms also, he had gotten so tall. And he looked so handsome, wearing a outfit similar to what she knows she had seen her father wear in the pictures in the story book. Emma tells Henry that he will be a big brother, and she is beyond relieved how excited for her, for him Henry was. She feared he would be hurt that she didn't keep and raise him, but will this child. But she reminds herself, he is a adult and he understands, shit he has always understood why she made that decision. But the fear still worried her, but here he was, like he always has, amazing her with his love and support.

Saying goodbye was the hardest, Emma has said goodbye to her son to many times in his life. First was the day he was born, never holding him or even looking at him. Then when the curse broke, she truly thought she lost him, but her love for him saved him. Saying goodbye, holding him when they thought Storybrooke was going to end. The worst goodbye was one never said; when she thought she was going to die at the hands of Gideon. But this one was topping it all. It was a goodbye for now; not knowing for how long is what made it so hard. It could be a few months or years, and she hated it. Yes she told Henry she wanted him to find the happy ending he helped her find. And she did, she once again made the selfless choice to let him go for his best chance, it was just as hard as the first time, but harder at the same time. This time was harder in the sense because of the time together and already having spent a few years apart already.

Emma hugged Henry, it was easily one of the tightest hugs she's ever given him, she held him close, taking in his scent, not wanting to let go. The only saving grace was knowing Henry would have Regina, and the other Hook. She wasn't lying when she said it made her feel better a version of Hook was looking after son for her. Emma reluctantly let him go, and her husband came and hugged him, making her even more emotional, and led her to give Henry another hug. God she didn't want to go back, not without him, like she said she was his mom and would never be ok with them being apart, and she hated how emotional was getting. She had every reason to though, she was about to have another baby and her oldest… great she was now getting even more emotional.

Killian leads her over to a open spot, he throws the bean to create the portal. With his hand on her small bump she looks back at her son again, not wanting to go through, she gives him one more silent I love you, and they go through. They step back into the backyard, the portal closing seconds later. Emma leans into Killian and starts to cry. Killian knows there is nothing he can say right now that would make her feel better, so he just holds her, and she knows this, and is ok with that. She didn't want to feel ok with it, not yet. She never would feel complete until Henry is back, in 6 months she will have a new baby, one that will rely on her, that will give her the second chance she's been waiting for. But right now, she just wants to be held while she dealt with this, waiting and hoping her son will be back soon. With her husband by her side, she can do this, she wasn't alone in her sadness of Henry not being home, not like she was all those years ago. No, even in her sadness she saw hope in her future, and like her parents always said, their family always finds each other.

 **Thoughts?**


End file.
